FACEFUL OF DELICIOUS ALIEN GOODNESS

Today, class, we will be studying the second life stage of the Xenomorph XX121, known colloquially as the “facehugger.” Springing forth from the Ovomorph (the egg-like first form of the Xenomorph) these arachnid-like creatures are actually parasitoids, with their only purpose being to make contact with a host creature’s mouth, for the purpose of reproduction via implementation. So remember, you will be safe from a facehugger as long as it can’t get close to your mouth. Now, on to page 334…

Whoops, we probably should have paid more attention in Xenomorph Biology 101! We’re supposed to… let the facehugger near our mouths? Right? That sounds right. Which makes this mug just perfect! A facehugger, perched atop an open egg, just waiting to gain access to the next open mouth that comes along. Fill it up with your favorite tasty beverage, bring it to your lips, and everything will turn out just fine, probably. You’ll feel like a million bucks, and even burst out singing “Hello! Ma Baby” or something. We’re pretty sure that’s how this works.

Buy Now from THINKGEEK

Super Mario Piranha Plant Poseable Lamp

Pose a Piranha Plant, perhaps? Super Mario Bros. fans will want to place this incredible Super Mario Piranha Plant Poseable Lamp on their desk or some other place of honor. The 12-inch tall lamp is powered by USB and sure is an attention grabber and conversation starter. It probably won’t try to eat you, and at least it’s not Petey Piranha!

Marvel Black Widow Cardholder

Baddies will think twice before reaching for your credit cards when they’re under the protection of Natasha Romanoff in this Marvel Black Widow Cardholder. Measuring about 4 3/4-inches wide x 3-inches tall in black-and-red faux leather with a themed red lining, it features zipper closure with a cool zipper pull, plus perforated, applique, and enamel rivet details. Don’t head out on your next assignment without it!

Spider-Man iTime Kids Watch

Plastic case with printed silicone straps!