ECHO STATION 3-T-8. WE HAVE SPOTTED IMPERIAL WALKERS.

You know how when you’ve spent a little too much time imbibing at your favorite wretched hive of scum and villainy, you stand up and have that moment where you think, “Walking. Yes. I’ve been doing this almost my entire life. Surely I can do it now.” And you proceed to place your feet Very Carefully, one after the other. “Right Foot, Left Foot, Right Foot, Left Foot.” Some upstart Rebel could walk by and take you down with one well-placed foot to the back of the knee. Best if they don’t know that. Right Foot, Left Foot, Right Foot, Left Foot.

It’s like drinking has turned you into an Imperial Walker, just like the ones on this Star Wars AT-AT Highball Glass. Honestly, we’re not sure if these are AT-ATs or AT-ACTs, but you’re welcome to debate amongst yourselves once you partake of a few drinks from one of these glasses. Not before. It’s not half as entertaining that way.

Also, do not drive while under the influence. Operating Imperial machinery is right out, too.

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Kitchen Nightmares!

On a dark, haunted night, a Russian oligarch dares a circle of international chefs to play the samurai game of 100 Candles--where each storyteller spins a terrifying tale of ghosts, demons and unspeakable beings--and prays to survive the challenge.

Inspired by the Japanese Edo period game of Hyakumonogatari Kaidankai, Hungry Ghosts reimagines the classic stories of yokai, yorei, and obake, all tainted with the common thread of food.

First course: With bad consequence, a ramen chef refuses to help a beggar, and a band of pirates get more (and less) than they were bargaining for after their encounter with a drowning woman turns ghastly.

Hungry Ghosts is cooked up by the infamous author and chef, Anthony Bourdain (Kitchen Confidential, Emmy-Award winning TV star of Parts Unknown) and acclaimed novelist Joel Rose (Kill, Kill, Faster, Faster, back again from their New York Times #1 best seller, Get Jiro!). Joining them this issue are stellar artists Alberto Ponticelli and Vanesa Del Rey, with amazing color by Jose Villarrubia, and a drop-dead cover by Paul Pope

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Star Wars Lando Polo Shirt

When you’re a teenager, you can get away with wearing a t-shirt and jeans to almost anything. You might get some eyerolls, but generally that’s all anybody expects out of your wardrobe. But you know, when you’re an adult – well, having adult clothing is the price you pay for being successful.

Star Wars: Solo Retro Han Solo Pullover Shirt

Probably this copywriter monkey’s favorite thing about the Solo movie is that all our Han Solo products no longer feature him frozen in carbonite. There are only so many different things you can say about that, and we ran out somewhere between Business Card Case and Fridge. (Rug. Cutting board. Ice cube tray. Shower curtain. Bank. Bottle opener….) You know what color this shirt reminds us of? Carbonite. Yup. It’s like Han’s in carbonite AGAIN. Only this time you’re in the carbonite with him once you don this shirt. But that could be okay. It looks safe. And comfy.

Star Wars: Solo Out West Wookiee Button Down Shirt

So the Dark Side has cookies. So what? Can a cookie be your co-pilot? Can a cookie wield a bowcaster? Can a cookie go outside on Hoth without bundling up in 27 layers of clothing like everybody else? Well, okay. Technically, yes. But that’s besides the point. Because if you want to enjoy the cookie you have to EAT the cookie and then what do you have left? Nothing but crumbs. If you pick the Light Side, you know what you have the next day? Wookiee. And the next day. And the next. Wookiees are nothing if not loyal.