HOW DO YOU TAKE YOUR CAF?

Like any good space program, Project Death Star was ultimately a success not because of the battlestations themselves (there may have been some small design flaws there), but because of the spin-off technologies that came out of the development of such a technological terror. New propulsion systems, improved laser cannons, and best of all: self-stirring mugs for the Imperial Officer lounges!

You don’t need to have sad devotion to an ancient religion to get your coffee to stir itself, you just need a Star Wars Empire Self-Stirring Mug to stir up your dark side roast the Imperial way! With a push of a button on the handle, you can skip calling over the coffee droid, and watch as a miniature whirlpool forms in your brew all on its own. Lord Vader may have taken his coffee black, but that didn’t help him conjure up stolen data tapes or find the Rebels’ hidden fortress, now did it? So stir in whatever you like, using just the sort of impressive technological innovation that the Empire is known for.

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Super Mario Power-Up Mushroom Pull-Over Hoodie

Mario is an interesting dude. Think about it. This former plumber has had his girlfriend stolen by a giant monkey, saved countless bizarre worlds from reptilian terrors, eaten more mushrooms and blinky flowers that a person probably should, been forced to race on many non-regulation race tracks, and has personally squashed perhaps the largest number of enemies of any video game hero.

Star Trek Picard Facepalm T-Shirt

Some days, even “Tea. Earl Grey. Hot.” won’t fix the problems of the world. At those times, we rely on the facepalm. But you know that when Captain Picard must hide his face in his hand, you’re in real trouble.

Marvel Infinity Gauntlet Stud Earrings

Now, you might have some objections to these Infinity Gauntlet earrings. First of all, there are two of them, but that’s not actually much of a problem – we’ve already seen that there are, in fact, two Infinity Gauntlets out there (the right-handed one in Odin’s Treasure room, and the left-handed one in Thanos’s grubby mitts).