AVAILABLE IN THE SAND KINGDOM AND AT THINKGEEK!

Yep. Mario has nipples. And now with ThinkGeek’s help you can take part in the the Nipple% speedrun IRL. Yours is probably going to take a little longer than 10 minutes from clicking Buy Now to shirtless in Super Mario Board Shorts, though. We haven’t gotten our teleportation devices at the warehouse up to speed yet. They still occasionally turn products into a pile of bananas. We think Timmy might have been monkeying with the backend code.

“Mario, you’ve defeated Bowser again, what will you do now?” Point the way to a vacation of rest and recuperation with these Super Mario Board Shorts. They’re perfect for relaxing by the pool or swimming in Lake Kingdom. Just don’t forget to pack your 3DS. Wouldn’t wanna get bored.

Buy now from THINKGEEK

Super Mario Piranha Plant Poseable Lamp

Pose a Piranha Plant, perhaps? Super Mario Bros. fans will want to place this incredible Super Mario Piranha Plant Poseable Lamp on their desk or some other place of honor. The 12-inch tall lamp is powered by USB and sure is an attention grabber and conversation starter. It probably won’t try to eat you, and at least it’s not Petey Piranha!

Marvel Black Widow Cardholder

Baddies will think twice before reaching for your credit cards when they’re under the protection of Natasha Romanoff in this Marvel Black Widow Cardholder. Measuring about 4 3/4-inches wide x 3-inches tall in black-and-red faux leather with a themed red lining, it features zipper closure with a cool zipper pull, plus perforated, applique, and enamel rivet details. Don’t head out on your next assignment without it!

Spider-Man iTime Kids Watch

Plastic case with printed silicone straps!